ZUCCHINI!

See those lovely, innocent little yellow blooms? So pretty, right? So fresh, and summery!

Wrong! They are bad, bad flowers. They will bring zucchini... and zucchini has become my nemesis.

My refrigerator is overflowing with giant green phallic shaped vegetables. The refrigerators of my coworkers and family members are being overtaken as well by these evil little beasts. I've contemplated sitting out on my front step and offering them to passers-by, or putting a basket-full at the end of my driveway that says "Zucchini, free to a good home!"

At first I was all "Yum!" and excited that my little garden experiment was proving fruitful. But the zucchini just kept coming... and these are no slender little pretty zucchini that you see at the grocery store... Nay, these are giant, robust zucchini that could inflict blunt force trauma if swung at someone. They pop up so quickly that I am picking some every other day... and they won't stop.

My vegetable garden has gone from this...


To this...


... in what feels like only a few days. And it does not show any signs of slowing down. The zucchini has grown so much more quickly than the other vegetables that the broad leaves create a canopy over some of the other plants, and I'm afraid that they will not be nearly as healthy or fruitful.

There are only so many times we can eat stir fry with zucchini, and grilled slices of zucchini, and steamed zucchini as a side dish, and pasta with zucchini, and zucchini grated into sauces... and zucchini... zucchini...

ZUCCHINI!

Lesson learned I suppose. The tomatoes and the zucchini will be planted on their own, outside the box next year. And I will only be planting one zucchini plant... and maybe I will neglect to water it sometimes... or something like that.

Anyone want some zucchini?

Serious.